Monday, February 1, 2010


Remember a few weeks back when I got my hand slapped by a commenter for calling Samuel, my little "write off." Well, I finally finished my list of what we are going to do with all that glorious tax money we get back!

#1 - Ferguson Hill Horn Speakers ($16,000): The bigger the better right!?!
#2 - This $32,000 gold belt will be the ultimate fashion statement.

#3 - How about this life size (twenty-two-foot) camarasaurus dinosaur replica for $50,000. I'm not greedy. This would be for Samuel. Garden gnomes are cute and everything, but this would really make us the talk of the neighborhood. The best part...the shipping is free.

#4 - I've finally solved my coffee pot woes, with this Nespresso Crystal Edition Coffee Maker. This bedazzling machine boasting 3,100 Swarovski-crystals is only $4,000.

#5- This authentic boardwalk photo booth for only $11,000 has a thermal photo printer that was designed by Polaroid, meaning there are never any chemicals to worry about (unlike with older models), ensuring loads of fun for years to come.

#6- It's one thing to integrate all our home electronics into one easy-to-control system, but what we really need is a virtual butler for just $20,000, to oversee everything and he even speaks with a British accent.

#7 - It's a stiletto! It's a tub! No, it's both! Talk about the perfect gift for the shoe connoisseur. Now only $17,000 - $27,000, depending on how many diamonds I want.

#8 - Imagine how jealous all our friends will be when they see Richard cruising down the street at a brisk 7 mph in his very own cupcake car for only $25,000.

#9- Well, now, who wouldn't want to do their business while seated on a $75,000 Swarovski crystal-encrusted commode.

#10 - Sure, a $5 corkscrew from the grocery store will open that bottle of wine, but this made-to-order $72,000 (yes, you read that correctly) corkscrew will open your most treasured friend's wine in opulent style—just what you need, right?



Shannan said...

You are hilarious! Good thing we adopted so we can have all that free cash to buy whatever we want!

and I am still puzzling over that Moses was pre-disposed to being a serial killer. They love your blog Tracey! :)

hey you missed a great Grammy's last night and the Michael Jackson tribute was A.MAZ.ING. I am such a baby because I was totally in tears over it. You should Youtube it. I love Michael Jackson and always will. There is still the suspicion but he was never convicted so I choose to ignore it and love the KING.:)
Can we still be friends????

Connie said...

Hmmm. That toilet and coffee pot look like a bear to clean.

Annie said...

UM, how gross would a crystal toilet be to clean. YUCK!

Also, that speaker looks like a giant breast pump. lol

Such The Spot said...

Where do you find these things?

Just read Annie's comment. So true!