Being a new mother I seem to get a lot of advice, which can be helpful, but is also very frustrating when it's from people who are insistent that their way is the BEST way. I also get advice (because I'm an adoptive mother) from those who think that my son is just a stand-in until I get "the real thing." Each week I will post a new question. I'd love it if you'd play along and offer us new mothers your pearls of wisdom.
HERE IS THIS WEEK'S QUESTION:
WHAT DO YOU USE TO DISCIPLINE YOUR CHILD (NAUGHTY STOOL, TIME OUTS ETC.)?
2 comments:
The first thing we do is remind them of the correct behavior. If we are going out we will remind them how we expect them to act, and remind them the consequence. Being proactive helps a lot.
For minor infractions, like arguing, being sassy, not sharing, we remind them of the proper way to do something and then ask them to do it the proper way.
If that doesn't happen we send one of them away from the situation. We just ask them to "reset yourself" by going down the hall and coming back calmly.
Next is time out.
I would say that most of our problems are resolved at "reset yourself" stage. Although, as I recently discovered, that's forcing physical activity as a form of discipline and is strictly forbidden. So....we are supposed to go straight to time out. But if the gov'ment isn't involved in your life, be thankful, and try the reset it works.
I've tried it all, including spankings for the worst offenses. What I've learned is that each child is different and respond to different methods differently. What does work is swift, decisive discipline applied with consistency, what ever method you choose. In the book 'Boundaries for Kids' they talk about not ignoring bad behavior and then pouncing on it-that teaches the kids to get away with the bad stuff for a long time, just up to your breaking point. I am guilty of this and really working to stop. It is a process, my friend!
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