Saturday, March 4, 2017
Initially, I didn't think I had BOUNDARY problems. Now I see that this is a major problem.
* Knowing what is my job and responsibility and what isn't gives me freedom. Each person carries his/her own load and God will do what we cannot do, but we have to take ownership of our own lives
* Setting boundaries lets others problems be their problems not mine. Strong fences allow the bad to stay out and gates allow the bad already in to leave and the good to come in.
* Not having boundaries allows others to take advantage of me
* Don't passively comply and inwardly resent
* Using "I" statements (I don't like it when...) gives a clear message and tells others the rules of your yard
* Its ok to physically removed myself from people and situations to maintain a boundary. Time away can help regain control of situation and create new ways of relating to improve the relationship. Forgive, but guard your heart until you see sustained change.
* Feelings should neither be ignored nor placed in charge. They tell the state of a relationship. Own them. They are your problem and you must find a solution.
* You have to both accept others boundaries and have a right to your own.
* Making decisions based on others approval or on guilt breeds resentments. Take responsibility for your own choices.
* We must own our own thoughts. Listen to others and weigh them. Be open to changing our minds and communicate our thoughts to others.
* Be is touch with who we really are and what our real motives are. What do I want and why?
* Having a fear of being abandoned can lead one to comply and inwardly resent. God wants us to be compassionate not sacrificial (compliant on outside and resentful on inside).
Labels: All About Me