Monday, January 2, 2017

DAY 2....Breath.....

With this being a new year it is the perfect time to reinvent myself. We have been through a lot of stress and change. My father-in-law died, I retired, we sold our house, our dog died and we moved our family 2500 miles across the country, from Albuquerque, NM to Lincoln, NH. Our stuff was a month late in getting here, we our living in my family home for a year (which if nothing else has made me realize that I don't want a big house nor a lot of land), my husband has a new job, my 8 year old son, Sam, has a new school and friends, our youngest is now in speech therapy and my mother had a stroke and is now in a nursing home.

Being totally honest, it was easier, when I had a full time job. Being a stay-at-home mom is HARD WORK. I am constantly ON.

I tried to get this post out yesterday, but the time got away from me and here I am on Monday night writing it just before I go to bed.

Anyway, I am finding it challenging to get all I NEED done, done and all I WANT done, done. My brother-in-law, Brian, gave me a book for Christmas.

It's a different way to look at the 168 hours in a week that we have all been given. You start with the important things and work backwards. You analyse your life, use your time more wisely and get rid of what is stressing you out and making you unhappy. I've only just started the book, but I love it.

I'm also reading a daily devotional that my sister, Karen, got me for Christmas.

Before our move, last June, I used to go in to work super early (an hour and a half before I had to be there) and I would use the first hour I was there as my prayer time. I watched Joyce Meyer, prayed and studied. Since the move, I have not been able to find the time...boy that sounds bad. Not finding time for God. Well, that is going to change! It really helped me to pray every day and I have really missed it. I have 1-2 hours a day where Andrew, my 3 year old, naps, and after 8 at night when both boys are in bed, to myself, but I was using this time to make phone calls, pay bills and do other work I had to focus on. I'm going to get up this week at 5 and try to do my studying then and if that doesn't work I'm going to take the first hour of nap time.

The third book I am reading is:
Amazon's description reads as follows, "This book details the communication and conflict-resolution skills that happy couples use to deal with differences. Psychologist Susan Heitler clarifies the basics of collaborative dialogue and shows how these techniques can be applied to even the most sensitive issues in ways that respond to both partner' needs and help to strengthen their relationship."

I am an A-personality, lazy is a 4-letter word, take charge, get-it-done type of person. My husband....just the opposite. He is calm, laid back, analyze the situation, enjoy the journey type of guy. I do believe God puts in our lives the people we need to learn from and will make us better people. My husband is just that person for me....I just need to slow down long enough to learn from him. He is wonderful man and I love his to pieces.

So, on this 2nd day in January with a LONG TERM TO DO LIST that includes: getting taxes done, organizing and printing my pictures, finding and buying a house, moving again, painting a few walls, resetting up my budget sheets that were lost when the old computer crashed, and figuring out how to e-trade, I am trying to take it one day at a time.

The TO-DO'S are never ending: laundry, shopping, snow shoveling, vet appointments, changing beds, garbage hauling, phone calls, appointments, sick kids.....LIONS AND TIGERS AND BEARS....OH MY!

I feel overwhelmed most of the time. I feel I'm not doing a good enough job, most of the time. I compare myself to others and feel like they have it all together, while I'm holding on by my fingernails.

This is the year I want to stop sweating the small stuff, spend more time with my kids and husband, declutter and give myself a break.

Good night all....on to day 3.

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